Oscar picks

"Heeey, I know you."

Tonight, we hold our tenth annual Oscar Smackdown, a sometimes glamorous but always downright nasty affair where the wife and I vie for the title of Supreme Academy Award Picker. I won last year and I won the Grammy Challenge two weeks ago, so I would like nothing more than to hand my wife her third consecutive loss, which would be certain to push her into a downward spiral of self-pity that will only end with her drowning in a sea of loserdom.
But first, I need to make my winning picks.
The Smackdown title is usually won or lost on the less glamorous categories -- the short films, both animated and live action; the documentary features and shorts; and the sound editing and mixing categories. For the shorts, which I almost never see, it's a good bet to pick something related to Jewish history and culture.

Short Film, Animated: "Presto" It's the Pixar short that was shown before Wall-E.
Short Film, Live Action: "Spielzeugland" The Oscar site description says, "In 1942, a German boy thinks his Jewish neighbors are going to Toyland." It's a lock.
Documentary Short: No Holocaust related material here, so I'm going with "The Witness - From the Balcony of Room 306."

Sound Editing: Wall-E
Sound Mixing: Slumdog Millionaire
Costume Design: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Makeup: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

Visual Effects: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. Without the effects, no movie.

Original Song: You would think two Slumdog songs here should produce a win for Peter Gabriel's "Down to Earth," but I just can't say no to "Jai Ho."

Original Score: Slumdog Millionaire

Film Editing: Slumdog Millionaire

Now for the high profile, big money awards:

Documentary Feature: Man on Wire was great, but I haven't seen Trouble the Water, which is about New Orleans. Crap! I'm picking Man on Wire.

Foreign Language Film: Waltz with Bashir, it's from Israel and it looks really cool.

Screenplay, Adapted: Slumdog Millionaire

Screenplay, Original: I liked In Bruges and Frozen River, but it's going to be Milk.

Cinematography: The Dark Knight deserves it, but it will be Slumdog Millionaire

Art Direction: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

Animated Feature: I was surprised to see Kung-Fu Panda won a bunch of awards at something called "The Annies," but I still think Wall-E will win.

Directing: Danny Boyle, Slumdog Millionaire

Supporting Actress: It's got to be Penelope Cruz for Vicky Cristina Barcelona. It must be.

Supporting Actor: Heath Ledger, The Dark Knight

Actress: Damn, this is tricky. I think people are burned out on the Kate Winslet. I'm going with Melissa Leo in a big upset over all the big Hollywood stars because that's the cool thing to do.

Actor: You should watch Richard Jenkins in The Visitor, but Sean Penn will win for Milk.

Best Picture: Slumdog Millionaire

Well, looking back on the picks, eight Oscars seems like too many for Slumdog. It wasn't that good.